Carry On

Life keeps moving forward as it always does.  I'v been trying to stay distracted from the adoption quest but it's very difficult.  We bought a new camera the other day because we got rejected by the 5th birth mother since our failed adoption.  (yes, I make big purchases when I'm depressed )  Chris from our agency said that this time we made runner up.  The birth mom loved our profiled but ultimately chose the other family because of the race of our son.  I wish I was an optimist by nature but I am not.  I doubt that we will ever be blessed with another miracle because we are nothing special.  We are not doctors or lawyers.  We haven't built college funds or even a back yard.  We are scraping up funds from the bottom of the pot in order to even be considered and we struggle to contribute to the world.  There is a definite wow factor that is missing when you look at our adoption profile.  
I'm not ungrateful for my beautiful life, it's just hard to let go of something you have been pouring blood, sweat, and tears into.  We have no ability to better the situation and nothing we can do to make us appealing to others. We are at the end of the rope and saying goodbye sucks.  Explaining it to my little man sucks even worst.

Speaking of saying goodbye...  Our dear friends Josh and Sarah are off to California to conquer the world. We love you guys, good luck with Chiropractic school.