This next weekend is when we are supposed to start "trying" again, which means I have about four days to make a huge life decision. I know we don't have to try this month but can I really pass it up when I want a baby so badly, but whose to say it would even work? Everyone tells me that things happen for a reason. If this is true was God trying to tell me something? Maybe I'm not ready, but how do you really know when you are ready? I haven't been getting much of an answer when it comes to the subject lately. In church yesterday they said that when you don't get an answer it means God trust your judgment. I don't mean to be sacrilegious but I don't even trust my judgment so can that really be right? Making a life plan is really complex. I had to drop one of my classes because the whole ordeal dragged me behind and I can't afford anything less than a B, but dropping it late means a W on my transcript. I will petition to have it removed because of the situation and the complete emotional breakdown, but that in itself is a big pain in the butt. The point is I have no idea what I'm doing. Do any of you fellow bloggers have a clue? If so what are your secrets? How do leap to the unknown? How do you even know if you should jump or if you're are supposed to, why not wait until tomorrow? Comments greatly appreciated!!!
5 comments:
Cassie! First, I didn't know that you blogged. Uber cool. Second, you are amazing. When we found out we were pregnant with Kylie, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I don't think that anyone can be "ready". I don't think that trying to time it perfect works. What I do know is that you and Adam are going to be amazing parents when your baby comes. I don't know what it everything you have been through feels like, but I know that it's probably the hardest thing that you will go through as a woman. Sometimes men have a harder time understanding. If you ever need someone to talk to or just watch a chick flick, don't hesitate to call me. I'll email you Jeremy's number! I love you tons!!!
Hi. I'm Jeremy Jones' mom and surfed onto your blog through Julie's. If it matters, here's my input: Don't "try", but don't "prevent". It will happen when the time is right. Don't put pressure on yourself or think you have to stick to some arbitrary timetable. When it does happen (and it will) it will be the best surprise ever. In the meantime, just carry on. No one is ever prepared for that first baby, but everyone figures out how to fit them in when they come. Your situation is so common. Sometimes your body is just shocked by that first one and doesn't know how to deal with it. But then the next time it goes, "oh yeah, I can do this!" I don't know you, but from what Julie tells me you are awesome people. It's going to work out for you. Just don't stress over it. Good luck!
One thing I've learned about the unknown is sometimes it comes whether we chose to jump in or not. I definitely think that's the case here. Finding your way through it will take time and support. Talking about it helps, and I hope you're leaning on Adam to help you through this.
Whatever happens, I hope it works out for the best.
You are so cute! Well, I don't think I was totally ready to be a mom when I got pregnant, but nine months is a long time, it really is. You definitely will have plenty of time to get ready, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, whatever. You will be an amazing mom and you will be totally ready (even if you don't think you are) when it is all meant to happen.
Also, we have been trying to figure out our lives lately and we have a big move ahead of us and my husband is trying to find a job, and it has all been pretty stressful and confusing at times - and I just want to say that I have learned that things pretty much never work out the way you think they should or the way you plan, but I really believe (especially now) that God has everything under control. I really think that everything happens for a reason, and that reason is for your ultimate happiness. Recently I had a little epiphany - it is kind of cool how when you're a mom, you get a little glimpse into how much God really loves you as His daughter, because YOU love YOUR baby more than anything and just want their happiness and their safety. Well, my son was playing with something that was potentially dangerous, so I took it away and he just cried! He was so sad and mad at me - he just didn't understand that he could get hurt or that it wasn't good for him. Well, that made me realize that at times in our lives when bad things happen or when we are really sad because the things that we think we want or need don't work out, that really it is ultimately for our good, for one reason or another. I realized that God can see the whole picture, like I could see for my son, and whatever happens is totally for our good. It may be that we need to learn something from it, or grow stronger, or that because of one thing that happens something else good will happen. Or it may be that the timing is not right for something. Anyway, I hope that all makes sense. And I know that whatever happens, you will be ready and everything will work out perfectly.
I also think that if you "want a baby so badly" then maybe the time IS right, I don't know. I think that often we need to just have faith even if we can only see one step ahead of us and the rest isn't clear yet. You just have to have that leap of faith. :)
Good luck, I know it'll all work out! Love ya!
Hey there. I am Luke Bailey's nanny/biggest fan. Brenda and I were talking about this kind of thing the other day and she told me about your situation. I went through a miscarriage as well and I love it when people will be so open about it. It super sucks when it happens to you and no one is ever prepared for it. I was so angry for a long time. It is a painful situation and the more we talk about it the more open other people become and we can offer the support and empathy everyone needs. I hated it when people told me everything happens for a reason and all that other crap that is supposed to help. Miscarriages suck, but that is no reflection on you. There is no rhyme or reason. Pray to be able to release the anger and you can call me if you want to talk. I hang out at Brenda's at least 3 times a week. Good luck.
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