Wounded but Still Here

Neuroscience teaches us that every life experience gets sealed into the files of our brain and contributes to the way we think. Sometimes if the experience is more than you can handle, you will lock it away somewhere you can not access it. However it continue to make its mark from that secret place where you locked it away. This week I contributed to my permanent record by experiencing the final chapter of my infertile story. Having a my uterus scrapped out was one of the most horrific emotional days I ever had to endure. Although it was so much better than having to go through a natural miscarriage. I had mild pain and very little blood. It made it all like ripping off a band-aid, you know the kind where the wound has started to heal but has managed to super glued itself onto the inside of the bandage making the removal that much more painful.

Thank you to those who sent your love and your comforting words. It means a lot. I have responded to things in a less than tranquil way. There have been angry days with no hope in sight, followed by days spent crying my eyes out, and then a lot of days robotically going through the motions. Luckily the last book in the Hunger Games series came out on Tuesday and as funny as it sounds it has been my saving grace.

I don't know why things happen the way they do. There's a good chance we'll never know. There is a new adventure that has come from this mess in which I'm excited for and completely intimidated by. We are going to adopt and we need all the help we can get!!!

Our first step is mountains of fund raising. I've given us one year to raise at least $10,000. Please stay tuned to find out how you can help answer our prayers.